True watchmaker . . .

Mar 25, 2020,19:18 PM

. . . tales , as told by . . .

. . . yours truly.

My pal Van owned jewelry stores in the San Fernando Valley.  One day, after he'd been in business for decades, a customer walks in to his second store and asks if he's the same Van that owned a store at another location.  "Sure enough!", said Van, surmising the person who'd just walked thru his door was a previous client.

"Ah, I thought so," he said.  Then he pulled a wrinkled scrap of paper out of his wallet.  "I'd like to have my battery changed, please."

Van glanced at the crumpled newsprint.  It was a coupon he had placed in a local newspaper when he opened his first store to induce new customers.  Then he looked at it again.

There was no expiry date.

So decades after the coupon was issued, he was forced to change a battery for no charge.  (There's a pun in there somewhere.)


* * * * *

One day, a regular customer of Van's walks in.

"Grandpa just died and left us a Patek Phillipe!  It doesn't run.  Please service it and call me when it's done.  I'm very busy and have to go back home now," she said as she tried to exit the store.

Both front and back doors were operated remotely; Van didn't let her out.

"Please come back, Mrs X - I have to give you a receipt."  As he looks at the watch for the first time, he realizes it's a quartz knock-off.

"Mrs X - this isn't a Patek Phillipe.  It's not worth even a hundred dollars.  Do you want the battery changed?"

Mrs X glared.  "You mean it's not a valuable watch?"

"I'm sorry, Mrs X . . . Grandpa might have owned a Patek Phillipe, but this isn't it."

Had Mrs X left the premises, Van would've been in a mess and then some.

smile  smile

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Van retired a few months ago from the jewelry business . . .

 By: Dr No : March 25th, 2020-20:07
. . . but added on a room at his home to house his jewelry bench and tools. He's still repairing jewelry for established customers, just not on a commercial basis for walk-ins.

Forced to change a battery for no charge...

 By: patrick_y : March 25th, 2020-19:37
No charge as in a battery that has an electrical charge? Is that the pun? Seems like he lost a battery in the first story, but didn't succumb to the trick by the lady in the second story.

Correct . . .

 By: Dr No : March 25th, 2020-20:07
. . . on both counts! ;-)

My friend Ken taught me to carefully photograph each watch that came in, especially jeweled ones

 By: cazalea : March 25th, 2020-21:01
He had been accused by new customers of stealing the diamond chips out of their watch bezels... ...  

I fixed this watch for my good friend Hal, when he was in the hospital

 By: cazalea : March 25th, 2020-20:51
He had worn it 60 years, since his wedding. As soon as he came home, he asked for his watch back. Against my better judgement, I took it to him. A few days later, he passed away, and the watch disappeared (caregiver or nurse). I combed the house multiple ...  

The same happened to my pal Rube . . .

 By: Dr No : March 25th, 2020-21:16
. . . when he was in conservatorship. A Patek Calatrava and Rolex 1803 stolen. When I informed the County agency that oversees conservators, they shrugged and essentially said, "Prove it." ;-(

I love how the ladies looked in the fifties and sixties of the last century... :-)

 By: George Gently : March 26th, 2020-02:11
I mean, look at that lovely readhead... (Sorry for the OT guys, having trouble focussing. That darn Covid-19 Virus!)

Glamorous days ...

 By: Cpt Scarlet : March 26th, 2020-02:31
From a bygone era.

True, Captain, true... [nt]

 By: George Gently : March 26th, 2020-02:35

It was the look and ....

 By: Cpt Scarlet : March 26th, 2020-02:39
The way they they could carry it off.

She can carry it off [nt]

 By: George Gently : March 26th, 2020-02:59
No message body Christina Hendricks ...  

He, he

 By: George Gently : March 26th, 2020-08:51
Idem dito, Dr.

ROFL 🤭 [nt]

 By: Cpt Scarlet : March 26th, 2020-10:34